I realised something.

Being in an east side school, a polytechnic, didn't take me away from my secondary school friends.

Nor were they the one who stayed away (but how true is this I don't want to know).

It's me who wanted to run away, to a new place, have a new story, create a new life.

Hide the truth and the lies of yesteryears behind me.

But looking at them, now.

I don't know what to say, or how to feel. I don't feel anything, I guess.

Everyone went (well nearly) went to the same JC. Or even so, they went JC. Poly has different holidays.

I would have gone JC too, but there would probably be nothing left of my brain cells. Then again, it's not a lot of difference in HTM.

I miss secondary school. There wasn't this many politics to scorn at or be scorned about.

There weren't many cute guys who would have your attention all the time.

There weren't many cute girls who whould have the attention of the cute guys.

There weren't many things to think about, and many projects to do.

Food isn't so expensive, haha, in secondary school. But I'm not complaining about the 5 canteens and a foodcourt I get here. Food is love.

Alex met a certain ex-Yusoffian over DOTA who knew me (I swear I don't know him) and that guy spread some nasty stories about me. I've yet to know if they're true, but Alex apparently won't tell me what that guy said.

I look at my ex-classmates' blogs and they're all still in contact. I'm the loser who thought she could run away from all that.

Why, what happened in secondary school?

Nothing. I just messed up my life, that's all.

Simply put it. I know I made a lot of mistakes. People didn't like me for them. I knew people didn't like me for them. So at the first chance I got, I jumped all the way from Bukit Batok to Tampines.

But I did have fun in YI. I did have love, and I did have joy.

I just didn't see it.

It's probably too late, now, since the ties are strong.