These words are my own

I tell you, I'm in love with that song (refer to previous post), and I just love Natasha Bedingfield's voice!

I've been so ever busy, but it's been a great week (:

Not much to update about, well, not now, cos I'm so tired, and I have to be up around 8 for ministry tomorrow.

But my itchy hands die die want to blog.

Sometimes things just don't go our way, and when we force it to happen, it doesn't end up the way we want it to be.

To you who is troubled, know that no matter what happens keep your cool.

Things will just turn out fine, because that's just the way things are.

We were never meant to have a bad life, it's the results of our decisions.

I heard a song today on the radio, and I just had to blog about it, even though I have a huge day in front of me.

These Words
by Natasha Bedingfield

These words are my own

Threw some chords together
The combination D-E-F
Is who I am, is what I do
And I was gonna lay it down for you
Try to focus my attention
But I feel so A-D-D
I need some help, some inspiration
(But it's not coming easily)
Whoah oh...

Trying to find the magic
Trying to write a classic
Don't you know, don't you know, don't you know?
Waste-bin full of paper
Clever rhymes, see you later

These words are my own
From my heart flow
I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you
There's no other way
To better say
I love you, I love you...

Read some Byron, Shelly and Keats
Recited it over a Hip-Hop beat
I'm having trouble saying what I mean
With dead poets and drum machines
I know I had some studio time booked
But I couldn't find a killer hook
Now you've gone & raised the bar right up
Nothing I write is ever good enough

These words are my own
From my heart flow
I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you
There's no other way
To better say
I love you, I love you...

I'm getting off my stage
The curtains pull away
No hyperbole to hide behind
My naked soul exposes
Whoah.. oh.. oh.. oh.. Whoah.. oh..

Trying to find the magic
Trying to write a classic
Waste-bin full of paper
Clever rhymes, see you later

These words are my own
From my heart flow
I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you

That's all I got to say,
Can't think of a better way,
And that's all I've got to say,
I love you, is that okay?

Enjoy, people. Tata!

I don't believe it.

You know, studying's so not for me. Oh well. I'll just have to pass this paper.

Have you ever tried doing something for someone really important to you?

And then you'd realized it wasn't working, and after struggling awhile, you'll give up.

And just at the point of giving up, it all comes back, the memories return momentarily, and you're right back to square one?

The things they'd do, people around us.

A small action might be so to you, however it might not be perceived the same way by others.

In the beginning of courtship, it is always sweet. The sweetest actions, the loveliest words. The hints drag on.

After two people get together, things change a little.

The ecstasy is slowly used up.

Don't give up hope, for love is all around. Whether you want it or not.

I just wanna go and sleep. RHT is killing me.

Did I ever mentioned I got my results back weeks ago and got a horrible GPA of 1.33 and I failed RHT and I have to retake it and if I don't pass the supp paper I'd have to retake this whole subject again and it'll be another semester of chi-square and one-tailed tests and research methods which I still know nuts about?

Not to mentioned I'm feeling terrible stretched out with my hectic schedule, I don't even know what I'm doing at times. And to think I'm so selfish to leave out my friends and family.

I need you.

Almost 400 posts already!

I believe I can do it. Everything in my life now.

Why can't I do it all at once? Everything.

Church, ministry, God. Friends, girls, boys, relationship, Trybe. Family, extended family.

All of it, every single day planned nicely.

If you want to ask me out, I'm so sorry. You'd have to plan a week before, and it's not because I'm some bloody big shot, I just have a lot of things to do. I apologise before hand.

I'll get my ministry schedule right first, cell group and church is fixed already. God is forever, and everything else falls in.

My weeks are planned weeks before the actual day.

You think it's fun being busy?

I love it, but it's caused my body to fail, like today.

I seriously need to plan my time out.

Oh crap, and money too -_-

If you disagree with me, and say that I spend too much time there and not here, you're welcome to raise it up with me. That will help me improve in my time management skills, and discipline myself into knowing what is priority in my life.

First up though, RHT paper this week, no going out. My week's packed already, with Children's day services and the chalet in the weekend.

And of course, sentosa with a special someone.

(:

Sorry people, anything has to be on next week.

Also, I'll apologise to Naios people for not turning up for the outing, I was totally knocked out today. I slept like, whoah.

Woke up to a splitting headache, too, but I'm better now, definitely.

Sorry to Henzy for the last minute cancel, things like that should not happen. It's just that church ministry has to come first. And anyway I was told last minute -_-

Sorry to Bingrong for the ever-continuing turning down of lunches and dinner!!!!!! This one really must say sorry, but really, I can't make it for last minute things anymore ):

Sorry to Sabrina for seeming like I don't have time for you! I really can't make it if you call me last minute ):

Sorry to everyone else who deserves a sorry!

I can't mess around no more, I'm 17 already.

It's time to be a Big Girl now!

Blogging is like?

Yeah, what is blogging to you? This is a mini English lesson I'm going to use as an introduction to my blog post today, just to spice things up.

You know, people always give descriptions like, I'm tired like shit, or this is as yellow as a banana... these are called..?

Okay I forgot what they are called. Help, please. But then, you get the gist of what I'm saying, right?

So, tagboard now, what is blogging like?

To me, blogging is like, eating something you love to eat, let's say, chocolate.

When I eat chocolate, I tend to think a lot. About everything possible, while enjoying the wonderful taste of chocolate inside my mouth.

And then after I'm done with it, I want more and more chocolate.

After which I fall sick from eating too much chocolate, and then stay away from it for awhile.

Therefore because I stayed away from it for awhile, I start to crave it again, and the cycle repeats.

NEVER MIND ME, HAHA.

Second visitation today, and it really inspired me. Well, David, not David Choo, the person whom I'm helping, really inspired me.

Wow, I don't even know where to start. Ask me about it.

Off to do songsheet now.

Anyway, about my previous posts, don't worry too much about it. I mean you guys should know me by now, I'm very emotional (HIGH I LA!), if I'm happy the world knows, if I'm upset the world knows, so, don't mind me, this is my blog afterall, hee hee!

LOVE TO THE WORLD!

3rd post for the day? There's something seriously wrong with me. I just crave for writing, can you believe it? Like how a thirsty man craves for water.

That's not the worst thing, I have a song stuck in my head on top of all the splitting feeling my brain's going through.

But it hurts, when I think, when I let it sink in, it's all over me
I'm lying here, in the dark, I'm watching you sleep. It hurts a lot.
And all I know is, you've got to give everything
Nothing less, cos, you know I give you all of me

Right off the top of my head too, them lyrics. Gwen Stefani's 4 In The Morning. I've been listening to it all over and over again, but the song's stuck, not even when I was watching that AWESOME Bleach movie.

Don't get me started on Bleach! Geez, Byakuya is just THE BEST LA. Why must anime characters (okay, the male ones) be so darn good-looking? Even though it's just fake.

Those.. huge-assed.. anime eyes. WTH?!

And his sword technique. That is just sick la, but it's cool.

And the way he protects his sister Rukia but is so cold to her!

I'm not going to stop at Byakuya, since from the beginning of this post it was perceived as meaningless already, and no one will read this far so I'll just rant my way through.

I've not started on Toushirou! WAH LAO shortie with the mean look and the ice. I love anime characters that make use of ice. Or water. Or snow. Whatever. It's all sparkly and nice and no blood spills, unlike using that scattered blade technique of Byakuya which is just gross la, just sick.

I don't get why anime girls have to have such huge boobs. Don't they get in the way?

I think they would. Geez.

My headache's not helping.

It's nearly 10. Darn. I so wanna.........

What a game.

It's just, damn.

I woke up twice in a row early already, my eyes decided not to work with me today.

Stupid contact lenses. Made me so tired I slept all the way home from Chinatown after buying moon cakes. And it was ONLY 6+ in the evening.

Two words were on my mind when I reached home : SLEEP NOW.

It's just, damn.

How can cluelessness get any worser then cluelessness?

I know, cluelessness repeatedly?

I wanna clang on my piano until my fingers are swollen.

I wanna strum on that guitar until all my picks break and my fingers bleed.

And I wanna type on this keyboard until the laptop breaks, but this laptop costs more then my life, so yeah.

Draft autosaved at 9:04 PM

Shit, I don't even know what I'm going on about.

Can't get to sleep, though, that's why I'm here.

Oooh crap, I feel the beginning of a very sore throat.

Maybe, just maybe, I'll feel better if I study RHT now.

oh my gosh, did I just say that? I think I'm feverish then, too.

Since when did Windows Live Mail provide 5 gb of email space?

I have only used up 1%? Gee.

OH, the woes, and I have no where, no one, to spill it to.

My heart just wanna break but I'm too busy laughing. See how confused I can get?

HEY, HEY, IT'S ALL OK.

Guess what song is that. Only CHC people will know anyway. HAHA. So, JY, fire away.

SHUT UP about the photos though, you didn't do very well, don't rant on me. HAHAHA.

Yums.

Oh man, I'm in a dilemma now, I hate them.

Always have to decide between doing which 2 things I love.

I'm sleepy already.

Wake up so early. Darn, you better be appreciative :P

Obviously. As anyone can see from the pictures, I did a little baking today. One of my most successful times today!

Some are reserved for you dear vivien! (:

Used the new biscuit gun I got in Malaysia EONS ago, didn't have time to bake until recently.

Getting a toy like that, to me, is like how you give a 5 year old boy a new set of trains or cars.

I love baking. I hate the cleaning up, though. Sighs.

Today is a slow moving day. I love days like this, where I don't have to worry much. I even enjoyed doing chores today.

Only another month before my peace is gone. GRAHH.

(:

What a night. Day. Whatever.

Friday was the rehearsal for the competition, and I kind of screwed that up cos of gastric (stupid lunner).

And of course, saturday was the real thing.

Expected not to win, anyway. BUT DAMN COOL they gave REAL MONEY. 50 bucks inside them envelopes.I know, cos I saw David's prize of 200 bucks.

DAMN COOL. CONGRATS TO DAVID (:

So tired.

Oh man, supp paper...

WHY IS IT NEVER ENDING.

What is with that individually-bordered-post that is so popular now?

Me, self-declared queen of HTML (note: SELF-DECLARED), have no idea how to do that, and to find that thomas and vivien both have things like that I INSIST ON KNOWING HOW.

After Saturday, though, and I only have 3 hourse left to :
1. Redo my nails
2. Eat what's left of lunch
3. Sing, sing, sing.

NEVER AGAIN I WILL JOIN A SINGING COMPETITION.

I think I've stressed enough on that.

And seems that there's a lot of blogtivity (blog activity, heh heh) going on, all those pass-around chain posts about your favourites this and that.

The latest one is hilarious, check out Thomas or Vivien's blog, both under Trybe

List of activities I have upcoming:
- Monday is stay at home. I have things to prepare for Tuesday
- Tuesday is a day of sand, sun, sea, wind, and love. AND FOOD.
- Wednesday, Mummy's taking me to Chinatown to buy mooncakes, YUM. Or there might be Naios outing!
- Thursday's reserved for Henzy la. I think he will start killing me if I say no to dinner one more time.
- Friday's for BR, Thomas, 2 people whom I have to keep turning down due to SYTYCS.
- Saturday? Sunday? OH PLEASE, I NEED RECUPERATION?

That's how it's going to be, unless there is last minute changes, which I highly anticipate.

Cos, that's where life really comes along, and blow you away, with little surprises that are tucked in every possible corner.

Ooooh, flowery language. Time to cook lunch (more like lunner - lunch + dinner) and do my nails will practice my stage mei li

Please pray for me. :D

Saturday, Riverwalk at 2 pm, I'll be bring my own rendition of Frank Sinatra's Fly Me To The Moon for the So You Think You Can Sing competition.

We even have a video, to prove it to you.

Sms 96494359 if you wanna come (:

I NEED MENTAL SUPPORT PLEASE COMEEE!

I think my currently skin is so flexible lah.

I just change the background when ever I want and call it a NEW SKIN.

Wooh, Min damn smart.

And damn bored.

Let me see what spring is like in Jupitar and Mars

WHY NO LOVE HINA ON CRUNCHY ROLL???

Oh well, some people might find Love Hina a bit erotic and WRONG, but the storyline is just so different. I really wanna know what happens in the end, but really...

Stuck on watching videos again! Oh well, it IS the holidays. But I haven't had much time to watch, with the SYTYCS competition this saturday, fan club things to do.. and a certain need to meet (:

OH well. I want to watch so many many.

And I need to calm down on this singing thing too.

REMIND ME TO NEVER EVER JOIN ANY SORT OF COMPETITIONS THAT REQUIRE ME TO DO SOLO THINGS LIKE THIS.

SYF is perfectly fine.

This is different!

NEVER AGAIN.

NEVER EVER AGAIN.

I mean it! Geez.

I will never stress myself out like this again.

And so, the best was to destress is, ironically, listening to songs (including the one that I have to sing).

I think I've posted this up before, but it won't hurt to do that again! It's a nice song (:

Cry On My Shoulder

If the hero never comes to you
If you need someone you'e feeling blue
If you're away from love and you're alone
If you call your friends and nobody's home
You can run away but you can't hide
Through a storm and through a lonely night
Then I show you there's a destiny
The best things in life
They're free

But if you wanna cry
Cry on my shoulder
If you need someone who cares for you
If you're feeling sad your heart gets colder
Yes I show you what real love can do

If your sky is grey oh let me know
There's a place in heaven where we'll go
If heaven is a million years away
Oh just call me and I make your day
When the nights are getting cold and blue
When the days are getting hard for you
I will always stay here by your side
I promise you I'll never hide

What real love can do
What love can do

I'm so happy, I can wilt a sunflower just by standing beside it.

I know I haven't blogged for so long! So many things happened, plenty of which I wanna say and some of which I don't wanna mentioned (something to do with a certain vocal training that happened over the weekend)

It's been, lets see... more then one and a half years.

Surprised? Shocked? Amazed? Windswept?

Happy.

This is from Vivian, whom tagged me to do this..

List out the top 5 presents you wish for:
1. A new pair of jeans
2. Liquid eyeliner
3. 2 way cake
4. concealer
5. this is a secret

Answer the following questions:-
The person who tagged you is:
Vivian

Your relationship with her is:
Good Friend

Your 5 impression of her:
1. damn tall la
2. damn skinny also
3. study hard for exam
4. got bf (:
5. my good friend

The most memorable thing he has done for you:
uh... share salad with me? HAHA

The most memorable words he had said to you:
eh, how was your paper? HAHA!

If he/she becomes your lover, you will:
HELLO? SHE'S ATTACHED!

If he/she becomes your lover, things he/she will have to improve on:
She's gotta be more lovong to her deardear LOL

If he/she becomes your enemy, you will try to salvage it?
NO WAY will she be my enemy.

If he/she becomes your enemy, the reason will be:
STUPID QUESTION

The most desired thing you wan to do for him/her now is:
uh. Be a good friend for her.

Your overall impression of him/her is:
Lovely outgoing girl!

How do you think people around you will feel about you:
damn noisy for someone so short

The characteristic(s) you love of yourself is/are:
make people feel at ease

On the contrary, the characteristic(s) you hate yourself is/are:
too direct

The most ideal person you wan to be is:
uh. somebody...taller?

For people who care and like you, say something to them:
YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL. whoever you are. In your soul.

Pass this quiz to 10 people that you wish to noe how they feel abt u:
1. Jem
2. BR
3. vivien
4. CY
5. seaner
6. JY (as much as you say you don't like and...)
7. Ja Mess
and wah lao anyone else lah.

So cold.

I mean the weather.

I hate this period of the year. I hate it when it rains, and it wets my shoes when I go out, and when it gets so cold.

I hate it when it rains during the holidays, and I can't do outdoor activities. I can't go roller blading, I can't go swimming, and worst of all I can't go sentosa!

It literally dampens my mood, if you get what I mean.

The only time I like rain, I guess, is when I'm in a car. Not if I'm going to drive! Daddy always has a problem driving when it's raining. But when it's raining, and I'm in the car, it'd be lovely to watch the rain.

I'm still learning how to play Xiao Yu Li Ke Bai II on the piano, and I must say, Jay Chou must have extremely large hands to be able to keep playing in octaves. I can handle it, but after lots and lots of ample practice and "sour" hands, if you get what I mean.

But playing it over and over again is like, WAH LAO. Firstly it does get a little boring. Secondly, it's such a sad song! You can just get emo by playing it!

Not that I am! But repeating it over and over again, part by part, hand by hand, is kind of taking a toll on my fingers.

I don't think I've ever needed to spend so much time on a piece.

Oh, except my grade 3 piano exam pieces. Those were killer, I tell you.

After watching 1 Litre Of Tears (and crying along with whoever who cries in the show, haha), I'm struck by this thought.

If, let's say (CHOIII TOUCH WOOD) one day, you are diagnosed with a terminal disease, what would you do?

Would you have time to do all that you want to?

I would, on contrary to what I told someone, haha, do all my favourite things.

I would read, and sing, and play the piano (unless that disease reduces my movement, like the girl in the show), roller blade, play pool, play this, eat that, read this, have that.

Well, in my neng li, that is.

And I'll do all that with everyone I know. EVERYONE. From the left to the right from the front to the back (hahaha), from primary school if they remember me, from secondary school, OF COURSE FROM TP LAH.

And Trybe! VERY IMPORTANT. I'd go for as many Trybe runs and camps as I can, and help Jasmine in logistics in every camp that I can.

I'd go out with everyone I know, in church, in wherever.

Most importantly, I think I'd forgive everyone who had once hurt me, and I'd apologise to everyone whom I've hurt.

And, if it's REALLY terminal, I'd spill all my secrets. HAHA.

I'd even let Jonathan (I don't think he read my blog, but yeah), who keeps on pestering to read my diary (LIKE, NO WAY) to really read it.

It's a pretty juicy book. It's your honour if you do get to read it, cos it amounts to the trust I have in you.

So far, not even JY nor Sabrina has read it. IN FACT, only me.

_{When it can't get through.}

ATCHHHH what a cold day it was, could stop raining

Sunday
So You Think You Can Sing?

Held between WYZ and LYL zones, this year's competition even includes cash prizes, and auditions were held right at expo hall 8 for all interested participants, which nearly reached 200.

Well my number was 122, and there were groups and solo categories too.

Yes I joined a singing competition. Don't make that face.

Jonathan and I sang Something Stupid, Jy and I sang Way Back Into Love, Jonathan and Cheryl sang An Jing, and there were MANY others from W376 and W450 who joined, too.

Jonathan and I both took part in the solo too. Honestly we both did better for solo lah.

AH well. Wait a few days more, and I'll tell you about the whole thing.

A sidenote - many thanks to Jem and CY who came down! Thanks many many many for you help la. seriously.

AND today.

FIRSTLY a message for mr LJY you know who you are. IT'S NOT THAT I DIDN'T WANT TO CALL YOU FOR THIS OUTING. I know you have school. And you have to do your assignment too. I've told the others that you'd be free on fridays (YOU ARE, RIGHT), and we'll have another outing then. DON'T GET EMO COS OF THIS PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE.

We still love you, me james wei jian and kok. HAHA.

People named above met up today after EONS AND EONS AND EONS (this is too much. we have to meet up more often) at west mall, before heading out to west coast park for a time of fun and excitement!...

...Only to be hampered by the rain -_-

Rain is called ame in Japanese, and when used in large doses, can make the user fully drenched, and in need of shelter.

Which came in the form of McCafe.

SO BORING LAH SPOIL MY MOOD THIS STUPID RAIN.

But James you're so smart eh? Last night when we were on the phone you were like, so do we need a Plan B just in case of rain? And I thought it WOULDN'T rain at all, and just carelessly suggested ice-skating.

We ended up ice-skating.

SO COLD!

I got pink gloves! Haha. But it's been SO LONG since I've ice-skated. Even though the ice-skating rink is in the west (HAHA SOMETHING FUN THE WEST FOR A CHANGE), the last time I went must have been when I was in secondary 2!

Anyway. Had pretty much a cheery time trying to get wei jian to move away from the railing, and try ing to skate backwards.

It's a lot easier to do that backwards thing on ice I must say.

We had plenty of pictures! But wei jian isn't online yet, only James sent me photo, and I wanna blog everything together, so too bad. haha.

It's been great to have gone out with you guys, really. It felt like secondary school again. HAHA.

But one looks forward into the future, and not turning back for the past.

I hope it doesn't rain on Wednesday, I wanna go Sentosa!

I wanna go LOTS of places this holidays. I don't know if I have time to go back to M'sia already ):

Miss my cousins loads!

Oh man I'm the slower blogger. -_-